Happy Hug A GI Day... :) Shangy!
>Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList:
To Subscribe send a blank email to
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Group email address:
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or email me here:
bcrsystems@earthlink.net
================
_
*"_"*
__ /`_`\ __
.' '. | / \ | .' '.
, / ')\^_^/(' \ ,
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'':::' '::::::::::::::::\_.__./:::::::::::::::''
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jgs '::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::''
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*~* Please Consider Giving To ShangralaFamilyFun.com
The cost of the website has gone up dramatically due to the
ever increasingly wonderful pages and photos being added each
week to entertain you and our fellow Christian families. If
every one would chip in $25 or more, we'd be good for the whole
year! So Please - I need your help!
"We are each of us angels with but one wing,
and can only fly by embracing each other"
-Luciano Decrescenzo
~ CALLING ALL CARING ANGELS ~
*~* WE NEED CARING And SHARING Angels *~*
>Do You Want To Be A Shangrala Angel?
If you'd like to help and be counted as a Shangrala Angel,
the easiest way to do that is through online giving. It is
easy to use, and most of all, it is secure. Please visit the
site, scroll down and click on the donate button.
A Secure PAYPAL form page comes up.
NOTE: Paypal will generate a 'Quantity 1' and 'Price per item'
form. Just ignore the price per item and put whatever it is
you desire to give in there. With Paypal, you will have your
normal receipt for your 'payment' donation in USD (United
States Dollars). You can put a memo in there if you'd like.
EVERY LITTLE BIT WILL HELP!
Any amount is greatly appreciated and needed!
PLEASE Visit Shangrala to Help:
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/index.html
OR If you'd rather send us a donation,
Please MAIL it here:
Elrhea Bigham
502 S. Harrison
Van Wert, OH 45891
*~* THANK YOU! MAY GOD BLESS YOU MOST ABUNDANTLY FOR YOUR GIFT!
================
*~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny,
inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here...
bcrsystems@earthlink.net
I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!!
AND For Facebook Users:
Please Friend Me / Like Me here...
http://tinyurl.com/cma6all
AND For Google Plus Users:
You can find me here... Shangy Bigham
https://plus.google.com/106648555948034085752/posts
AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family!
^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :)
-<>-
* NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or
any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving
the scroll button on the mouse.
You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in
your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while
pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for
smaller text!
================
>-->HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :)
This roaring hot new page is from our friends LouiseAu and Cloie.
Many of us know Will Rogers as an old western cowboy actor, but
if you are like me, you will be surprised to learn that unlike
Elizabeth Warren, he actually had Cherokee blood and tribal
heritage as his mom was a Cherokee and he grew up around them.
He never bragged about this though, but used his upbringing as an
insight to his beloved wit and humor. Be sure to check out this
fun page here...
,'-',
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Storm
Will Rogers Quotes
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/willrogers.html
---
...Very insightful and funny! Thanks Ladies!
-<>-
/|_\|/_/|
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*~* Another Super Duper Caring And Sharing Month Last Month!
>Please Be Sure To Visit And Share These With Your Friends:
Go Green Art!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/greenart.html
Humorous Graphs!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/graphs.html
Dog Thoughts!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dogthoughts.html
Amazing Trivia Facts US!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/triviafactsus.html
Most Spectacular Places 8!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/spectacularplaces8.html
Have A Heart!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/heart.html
Thoughts Into Action 11!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/action11.html
Extreme 3D Floors!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/3dfloors2.html
Living With Bears!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bears2.html
Back In Time 2!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/backintime2.html
_.
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* Most Abundant Thanks And God's Blessings To All Our Contributors!
=======================================================
>-->From SmileZilla:
___
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| | LGB
Father: Why don't you get yourself a job?
Son: Why?
Father: So you could earn some money.
Son: Why?
Father: So you could put some money in a bank and earn interest.
Son: Why?
Father: So that when you're old you can use the money in your bank
account ...and you would never have to work again.
Son: But I'm not working now.
-<>-
Blonde goes into the furnishing store.
Blonde to the salesman: "Have you got pink curtains?"
Salesman: "Yes mam what size?"
Blonde: "17 inches long please."
Salesman: "17 inches long. What room are they for?"
Blonde: "They're for my PC monitor."
Salesman: "Monitors don't have curtains?"
Blonde: "Hello-o-o, I've got Windows!"
=======================================================
+------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+
March 4 is Holy Experiment Day and Hug a GI Day
March 5 is Mardi Gras / Fat Tuesday and Multiple Personality Day
March 6 is Ash Wednesday, Dentist's Day and National Frozen Food Day
March 7 is National Crown Roast of Pork Day
March 8 is Be Nasty Day and International (Working) Women's Day
March 9 is Panic Day
March 10 is Daylight Savings begins at 2:a.m., International Find
a Pay Phone Booth Day and Middle Name Pride Day
=======================================================
>-->From GoodCleanFun:
_..--""-. .-""--.._
_.-' \ __...----...__ / '-._
.' .:::...,' ',...:::. '.
( .'``'''::; ;::'''``'. )
\ '-) (-' /
\ / \ /
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>Environmentalist?
My friend Julie and I were eating at a Chinese restaurant. When an
elderly waiter set chopsticks at our places, Julie made a point of
reaching into her purse and pulling out her own pair. "As an
environmentalist," she declared, "I do not approve of destroying
bamboo forests for throwaway utensils."
The waiter inspected her chopsticks. "Very beautiful," he said
politely. "Ivory."
-<>-
>Office Etiquette
I was briefing my department on a less-than-thrilling subject: office
etiquette. I suppose I was overly enthusiastic, because when I
checked my watch, I was amazed at how late it was.
Not so my audience: One man said, "Sir, if your watch has stopped,
there's a calendar behind you."
-<>-
>Safety at Work
Safety is a major concern at the manufacturing company where I work.
So I'm constantly preaching caution to the workers I supervise.
"Does anyone know," I asked a few guys, "what the speed limit is in
our parking lot?"
The long silence that followed was interrupted when one of them piped
up. "That depends. Do you mean coming to work or leaving?"
-<>-
>Nursing Career
I didn't realize how much my nursing career had affected my
family until the day my three-year-old granddaughter said to me,
"Gramma, I think my blood sugar is low. Can I have a cookie?"
=========================================================
>-->From Our Friend LouiseAu :)
/ _
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~\/ /
| . _ . |--\
_| # ( # )
/ \ _ # /
-_ _-~
-'--`-_
/ . |
| |~|
|-----,,)
--------
|_|_|
_~__~__\ W<
>SMILES
Father: “Son, you were adopted.”
Son: “What?! I knew it! I want to meet my biological parents!”
Father: “We are your biological parents.
Now pack up, the new ones will pick you up in 20 minutes.”
----------
A man with two badly burned ears went to the emergency room for medical
treatment. "What happened" asked the doctor. "Well, my wife was ironing
while I was watching the ballgame on TV," began the man. "She put the
hot iron near the telephone and when the phone rang, I answered the
iron." The doctor nodded, "But what happened to the other ear?" "Well,
no sooner had I hung up," said the man, "when the same guy called
again."
----------
Morris needs a lawyer, so he grabs the yellow pages and picks out a law
firm ---Schwartz, Schwartz, Schwartz & Schwartz.
He calls up and says, "Is Mr. Schwartz in?"
The man says, "No, he's out playing golf."
Morris says, "All right, then let me speak to Mr. Schwartz."
"He's not with the firm any more, he's retired."
"Then let me talk to Mr. Schwartz."
"He's away in Boston, won't be back for a month."
"Okay, then let me talk to the other Mr. Schwartz."
He says, "Speaking!"
----------
A county traffic policeman recently stopped a woman for exceeding the
posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name. She said, "I'm Mrs.
Ladislav Abdulkhashim Zybkcicraznovskaya from the Republic of Uzbekistan
visiting my daughter at Columbia." The cop put away his summons book and
pen, and said, "Well... OK... but don't let me catch you speeding
again."
----------
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unknown
An older couple regularly attended church. The pastor was much impressed
by how harmonious and how in love they seemed. They always held hands
all through the service. One day after church, the pastor couldn't
resist going up to them to express his admiration. He said, "I find it
so inspirational to see how deeply in love you are, even, after all
these years, holding hands like that." The wife looked up sharply and
said, "It's not love, Pastor, I'm just keeping him from cracking his
knuckles."
----------
A man decided to try skydiving. The instructor was telling the class
that the main chute should be deployed at 500 feet. If that didn't work
be sure to open the backup chute by 400 feet.
One student asked "How long do you have if neither chute works before
you land?"
The instructor replied, "The rest of your life."
----------
It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the
intercom: "Will the students who are parked on University Drive please
move their cars so that we may begin plowing."
Twenty minutes later there was another announcement: "Will the twelve
hundred students who went to move 26 cars please return to class."
----------
'
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The school of agriculture's dean of admissions was interviewing a
prospective student, "Why have you chosen this career?" he asked.
"I dream of making a million dollars in farming, like my father," the
student replied.
"Your father made a million dollars in farming?" echoed the dean much
impressed.
"No," replied the applicant. "But he always dreamed of it."
----------
My 12-year-old daughter asked me, "Mom, do you have a baby picture of
yourself? I need it for a school project."
I gave her one without thinking to ask what the project was. A few days
later I was in her classroom for a parent-teacher meeting when I noticed
my face pinned to a mural the students had created. The title of their
project was ... "The oldest thing in my house."
----------
On a hot summer day, a farmer and his dog were riding in a wagon pulled
by two horses. After riding several miles, one of the horses said,
"Whew, sure is hot today."
The farmer, obviously surprised, said aloud, "Wow, I didn't know that
horse could talk!"
The dog replied, "Neither did I."
---
...HaHa! Great Ones! Thank You LouiseAu!
=========================================================
>-->From HandyHints:
.-.
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( o )-( o )
.-\-'.|,`-/-. .-.
( o )--*--( o ) ,-( o )-.
`-/-.'|`,-\-' ( o )-( o )
( o )-( o ) .-\-'.|,`-/-.
`-( o )-' _( o )--*--( o )
`-' \/_/ `-/-.'|`,-\-'
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|/ |\
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|/_/
Finally...March is here, and spring is right around the
corner! Hip Hip Hooray!
Who is up for doing a good deed? I love sharing these
website with you to help out others.
Let's keep our troops comfortable.
Do you have baby powder or foot powder to spare? If so,
please send to Packages From Home (PackagesFromHome.org)
They'll include it in care packages they ship to troops,
who use it to keep their feet dry and comfortable on long
missions.
Mail to:
Packages From Home
5643 N. 52nd Ave.
Glendale, Arizona 85301
-<>-
Winter brings dry air to the home which makes it easier for
dust to go airborne. What's the simple fix you ask?
Keep your home's humidity level at about 50% (most humidifiers
allow you to set a specific humidity percentage).
Not only will it make your home feel more comfortable, it will
also help weight down dust particles so they can't spread
all over your home.
Just make sure not to go over 60% humidity because too much
moisture creates the ideal environment for icky dust mites.
-<>-
>Kick off dirt at the door
Just by clicking your heels.
We track dirt on our shoes all throughout the day, which
makes up about 60% of the dust in our home!
Just by tapping your shoes together three times on your
doormat before you enter is shown to shake off 40% of
the dirt collected. That's a huge chunk!
-<>-
>Keep your blinds clean with a citrus 'shield'
Blinds and baseboards attract dust because the air circulates
more easily around them, thanks to drafts and heating.
Wipe them down with a cloth dampened with a solution made of
one part lemon juice to two parts warm water.
The acid in the lemons form a barrier that prevents dust from
settling and also blocks static electricity, so dust will be
repelled in the first place.
-<>-
>Wipe your bedside table each morning
Keep wipes near your bedside table, and give your bedside
table a quick wipe when picking up your phone in the morning.
That's one less chore to tackle on the weekend.
-<>-
>Save Excess Bacon Fat
It's almost un-American to throw away bacon fat. Store the
useful (if admittedly unhealthy) stuff in an airtight
aluminum or stainless steel container in the freezer, and
use it to make corn bread or fry eggs or potatoes.
You can also use bacon fat instead of oil in a spinach
salad: Combine two parts bacon fat to three parts balsamic
vinegar. Add one part vegetable oil to the mix if you like
a less pungent dressing.
---
...Excellent to use to pop popcorn too!
-<>-
spring is in the air...
\ boooooh!
\ /
_/\_/\ __(\___/)___
(, (o\\/ \_/_ _ (__/
/` _ /\ ), (o \
/~ _//\ \___ /_ / \___
\_('|| ~ || \ \__,-' ~ || \
||____||/ \ ||____||/ \
| === | \_\ | === | \_\
_| . |_/ ) _/| . |_/ )
_____ / | | / /\_____/ /| | / /\_______
| (_(| - (_(/ \_\| - \_\/ |
| | | | | |
| | ' | | ' | |
| | | | | |
| | | | | | | |
| | | | | |
| |__'____| |__'____| |
| || || || || |
|b'ger____/ /\/ /\___________/ /\/ /\_________|
(_(_(_(_/ /_/_/_/_/
>'Go Green' Hints:
Plant some trees
Ecological sustainability is very important when it comes
to eco-friendly living. Without a stable ecosystem, things
start to fall apart.
Making sure that we're planting more native trees to
replace those that have been felled to make room for
developments is something that more people and businesses
need to do to protect the environment and improve air
quality.
---
Growing your own veg isn't just a good way to save money,
it's also a great way to cut down your carbon footprint and
be eco-friendly.
Don't have any outside space? Windowsill boxes are a great
way to brighten up your view, filter the air coming into your
home and offer plenty of space for herbs and small vegetable
patches.
=========================================================
>-->In The Worldly News:
Speech: Donald Trump Delivers a Speech at the 2019 CPAC
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3I9J9IaZC7o
CPAC 2019 - A Conversation w/Rep. Devin Nunes and Tom Fitton,
Judicial Watch
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RaB_FNoC6RM
Glenn Beck At CPAC 2019
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dXl1j6215BY
TED CRUZ: "The Left Has Lost It. They Are The Destroy
President Trump Party"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGO7HVckD0A
Michelle Malkin speaks at CPAC 2019: full speech
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPeNkqa0_DE
CPAC 2019 - Candace Owens
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_oExoBW7eKk
CPAC 2019 - Diamond and Silk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8BsT4IiLpoE
CPAC 2019 - Brandon Tatum
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6yaI40lnh4
CPAC 2019 - A Conversation on Criminal Justice Reform
w/ Van Jones & Matt Schlapp
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOK-lFPWkh8
CPAC 2019 - Disarming the Left's Hypocrisy: The Fatal
Disadvantage of Gun Control
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOXWTo6WiTo
The Ingraham Angle 3/1/19
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hq51exA-AdU
Justice With Judge Jeanine 3/2/19
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73hsJUITRZg
U.S. Energy Secretary Rick Perry blasted proponents of the Green New
Deal as “a bunch of kids who’ve never been on the playground before.”
https://tinyurl.com/y3nxe6s7
Ocasio-Cortez Hit With Campaign Fraud Lawsuit
https://tinyurl.com/y363o2fs
African-American Dehumanized By Dem Rep Has One Question for
Her Critics
https://tinyurl.com/y3s89hrl
White House
https://www.whitehouse.gov/
WestWingReads:
https://www.whitehouse.gov/westwingreads/
WhiteHouseNews:
https://www.whitehouse.gov/1600daily/
Latest From AFA:
http://tinyurl.com/j7lakqw
Students For Life
https://tinyurl.com/yd5nxmu6
Latest From OperationRescue:
http://www.operationrescue.org/
Product Alert: Beef, Fish, Medications
http://www.emergencyemail.org/products/?fmt=text
Health Alert: Plastic Found in Deli Meat
http://www.emergencyemail.org/health/?fmt=text
-<>-
>From BizarreNews:
It's called 'getting in over your head'. When you get your-
self in trouble but instead of trying to repair the damage
you just make things worse. We've all done it. The man in
today's story did it. To the tune of $50,000. The first
thing you do when you find yourself in a hole is stop
digging. This guy traded in his shovel for a pickaxe.
60-year-old Robert Brandel had a brilliant idea. He wanted
to bet on the last Super Bowl by buying a 'square' in an
online pool. But more squares equals more opportunities to
win. So Brandel made up some of the names in his Super Bowl
Square in an attempt to take home most of the winnings
himself. Instead he fell far short.
So he did what any crazy person who owes 50 thousand would
do; he faked his own kidnapping.
According to Mr Brandel's version of events, he went to pick
up the two men in his truck because they were involved in a
Super Bowl Squares with him. Brandel said the men threatened
him with a gun, stole $16,000 in cash and forced him to drive
them around the western part of New York state for two days
before tying him up and leaving him in a car park.
But New York State Police became dubious about his account.
"Further investigation and interviews revealed that this
elaborate story was fabricated," they said in a statement.
Officer James O'Callaghan told local news that they became
suspicious because Mr Brandel was clean-shaven "around his
beard" and calm when they found him, despite it apparently
being the third day of his abduction.
Officials now believe he was trying to get out of paying the
50k.
Mr. Brandel is due to appear in court later this month to
face charges of fraud and filing a false police report.
-<>-
We have all seen martial arts movies where the characters
can do superhuman things; leap incredible distances, catch
bullets, cling to walls, disappear, but what about a martial
artist who fights animals?
You might have heard of Masutatsu Oyama. He founded Kyokushin
Karate and among the many stories about his career were his
famous bare-handed bull fights. Whether or not these episodes
were propaganda or real actual fights with bulls, the stories
were famous enough to inspire a 1975 film called 'Karate
Bullfighter' starring Sonny Chiba.
But even still, those are just stories and movies. Real,
modern day martial artists don't train by fighting animals
five times their size, do they?
Several times a week, kung fu teacher Ren Ruzhi of Beijing,
China enters a ring to spar with a bovine opponent around
five times his weight and capable of killing him, but the
24-year-old has never been hurt. Besides, he says, grappling
with a snorting bull is exciting.
"It symbolizes the bravery of a man," Ren said.
Unlike Spain's more famous sport, the Chinese variant of
bullfighting involves no swords or gore but instead fuses the
moves of wrestling with the skill and speed of kung fu to
bring down beasts weighing over 800 lbs.
*--- What Happens When You Park In Front of a Hydrant? ---*
A California driver got an important reminder about not
parking next to hydrants when firefighters had to shatter
two of their windows. The Anaheim Fire Department tweeted
photos of a car after firefighters had to break both of
its rear windows to run a hose through the vehicle to
reach the hydrant. "Ever wonder what happens when a car is
parked in front of a fire hydrant and a fire breaks out?"
the tweet said. "Is a closer parking spot worth the broken
windows and the citation and towing fees?" The department
said there wasn't enough room to run the hose under the
car, and running it over the top of the vehicle would have
caused more damage than merely breaking the two windows.
The vehicle was impounded and ticketed.
*--- That's Gotta Be Some Kind of Record ---*
Rhode Island police have arrested a man they say was
driving under the influence when he struck more than 40
other vehicles. Police say 45-year-old Christopher
Paolissi, of Foster, was "zig-zagging" his pickup truck
when he struck 41 vehicles in Providence. Police say
Paolissi was intoxicated, and he was driving about 15 mph
when officers stopped him. He was hospitalized with
non-life threatening injuries. No other injuries were
reported. Police Chief Hugh Clements says officers are
compiling a "lengthy report" due to the number of vehicles
hit. Paolissi is facing multiple charges, including
driving under the influence, reckless driving and failure
to stop after an accident.
*- This Is The Kind of Thing You Can Expect at a Nick Cage Fest -*
A professional stuntman attempted to break a Guinness record
for performing jumping jacks while on fire at a Michigan
festival celebrating Nicolas Cage. Schuyler White, who served
as the actor's stunt double in 2016 film Dog Eat Dog, was
ignited at the kick-off event for the sixth annual Nicolas
UnCaged event in Hamtramck, near Detroit. White shared photos
from the attempt on Facebook. An on-site official counted
White's jumping jacks before being extinguished at 12, short
of his stated goal of over 30. The Guinness World Record for
most consecutive jumping jacks (full-body burn) was set by
Sean Kinney when he performed 30 jumping jacks in 2015 in
Los Angeles. The Nicolas UnCaged festival, an unofficial
celebration of the actor's work, features film screenings as
well as performances of songs, skits and poetry inspired by
Cage.
*-- You Call That a Florida Mulligan ---*
A Florida golfer said she was able to avoid a penalty thanks
to a confused alligator that snatched her ball out of the
air. Joanne Sadowsky said she was playing with her husband,
Len, in a couple's tournament at the Bonita National Golf
Club when she had a bad tee-off on hole 2. "I shanked the
ball to the right, and it was heading to the water," she
told the Naples Daily News. "It was close to the gator's
head. He saw it, jumped up and caught it." The hungry
gator's mistake earned Sadowsky a free drop. "It saved me
from a hazard penalty," she said. She said the free drop
unfortunately wasn't enough to win the tournament. "We came
close but were just out of the money," Sadowsky said.
Alligators in the Bonita Springs area have been known to
display unusual behaviors in the past -- one of the reptiles
was caught on video last June taking a rare swim in the ocean.
=========================================================
>-->From TheGroaner:
_.--"""".o/ .-.-._
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>Here are a few of my random thoughts...
1. Do dog lovers always see spots?
2. A mobile home with a flat tire is just a home.
3. Stalking is when two people go for a long romantic walk together
and only one of them knows it.
4. If a coffee mug and a shot glass had a baby would it be a mug shot?
5. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
Now, I've thought too much. I must rest. Don't think about my thoughts
too much or you'll need to rest as well. Think about it!
-<>-
>He Did Him A Favor
A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report
it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.
-<>-
.---. .---.
( -o- )---( -o- )
;-...-` `-...-;
/ \
/ \
| /_ _\ |
\`'.`'"--.....--"'`.'`/
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jgs / \
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>Awkward!
Employer: "Where did you receive your training?"
Applicant: "Yale."
Employer: "Great, what's your name?"
Applicant: "Yim Yohnson."
-<>-
>New Medication
A distraught patient phoned her doctor's office. "Is it true",
the woman wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed
has to be taken for the rest of my life?"
"Yes, I'm afraid so." The doctor told her.
There was a moment of silence before the woman continued, "I'm
wondering, then, just how serious my condition is. This
prescription is marked 'NO REFILLS.'"
-<>-
>Now That's Really Sick
An employee who had a terrible history for taking time off
phoned in again one Monday morning: "I'm sorry, but I'll not
be able to come in today as I'm too sick."
On hearing this his exasperated boss could barely conceal his
anger and retorted in a rage: "Well, just how sick are you?"
"Well" the employee sighed, "I'm in bed with my sister!"
-<>-
>Q and A Quickies
Q: What did the clock say to the watch?
A: Tock to you later.
Q: What do you call a guy who never farts in public?
A: A private tutor.
Q: Why did the kid start a gardening service?
A: He wanted to rake in some cash!
Q: What goes up when the rain comes down?
A: An umbrella!
Q: What makes a man think about a candlelight dinner?
A: A power failure.
.-------------------.__
/` ( I don't get paid )
O/ __ ( enough for this #@#$!% )
/ / / `---O-------------------'
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______| |_|| | (___ ;' `. ;
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`. |//\\//\\//\\//\\/|
| |\\//\\//\\//\\//\|
________/ \\\_\___________/ jv
Q: What do snakes put on their kitchen floors?
A: Rep-tiles!
=========================================================
>-->From CleanLaffs:
AS FRESH AS IT GETS
////////////////////////
////////////////////////|
//////////////////////// |
////////////////////////| |
| _\/_ | _\/_ | |
| )o(> | <)o( | |
| _/ <\ | /> \_ | |
| (_____) | (_____) | |_
| ~~~oOo~~~ | ~~~0oO~~~ |/__|
_|====\_=====|=====_/====|_ ||
|_|\_________ O _________/|_|||
||//////////|_|\\\\\\\\\\|| ||
|| || |\_\\ || ||
||/|| \\_\\ ||/||
||/|| \)_\) ||/||
|| || \ o / || ||
|| \ / || LGB
||
||
________
\________/======
/ ( || ) \
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he
said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're
cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter. Oh my GOSH! WHERE are we going to get
MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful ... CAREFUL! I
said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking!
Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST
your mind?
The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with
you? You think I don't know how to fry eggs?"
The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it
feels like when I'm driving."
-<>-
Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog Skipper
had recently died.
"You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad. Skipper's probably
up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."
Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a
dead dog?"
-<>-
When I was around 4 years old, I was biting my nails pretty
badly and my mother showed me a picture of a child with a
very swollen belly due to malnutrition. "That will happen
to you if you keep biting your nails," she told me.
Later that week we were in the supermarket standing in line
at the checkout counter behind a lady who was obviously 9
months pregnant. I pointed to her and, in a very loud voice,
said, "We know what she has been doing don't we mommy?"
Have you ever seen your mother try to crawl under a cash
register and hide?
-<>-
A wife, being the romantic sort, sent her husband a text;
"If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are
laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a
bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying,
send me your tears. I love you."
He replied, "I am on the toilet. Please advise."
-<>-
=== ===
=== ===
___===____________oooo___________oooo____________===___
|___===___________________________________________===___|
=== | /O O\ | ===
dwb || || jrb
=== || || ===
( | _ | )
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|| _/_-_\_ || \
ooooO /___|___\ Ooooo ==
((( )|____^____|( ))) / \
(|)MMMMM| |#####(|) |MILK|
(_)MMMM/ \####(_) |____|
---------------------------------------------------------------------
__ ____ ___ __ ___ ___
( )(_ _) ( \ / \( _)/ __)
)( )( ) ) )( () )) _)\__ \
(__) (__) (___/ \__/(___)(___/
____ _ _ ___ ___ __ ___ _ _ __ __ __ ___ _
(_ _)( )( )( _) ( ,) / \( \( \/ ) / _) / \ / \( \ / \
)( )__( ) _) ) ,\( () )) ) )\ / ( (/\( () )( () )) ) )\_/
(__) (_)(_)(___) (___/ \__/(___/(__/ \__/ \__/ \__/(___/ (_)
A wife asked her husband, "Honey, could you please run to
the store and get a carton of milk, and if they have eggs,
get a dozen."
A while later the husband returned with a case of quart milk
cartons.
Staring incredulously at the 12-pack case of milk, his wife
asked, "Why the heck did you buy so much milk?"
Her husband said, "They had eggs."
-<>-
>TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED the 50s, 60s and 70s!
First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or
drank while they carried us.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a
can, and didn't get tested for diabetes.
Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with
bright colored lead-based paints.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or
cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets,
not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.
As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or
air bags.
Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always
a special treat.
We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle
and NO ONE actually died from this.
We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soda
pop with sugar in it, but we weren't overweight because WE
WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as
long as we were back when the streetlights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps
and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot
the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we
learned to solve the problem.
We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video
games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies,
no surround sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no
Internet or Internet chat rooms...WE HAD FRIENDS and we went
outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and
there were no lawsuits from these accidents.
We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did
not live in us forever.
We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games
with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it
would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on
the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to
them!
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team.
Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment.
Imagine that!
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was
unheard of. They actually sided with the law!
This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers,
problem solvers and inventors ever! The past 50 years have
been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we
learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL.
And YOU are one of them! CONGRATULATIONS!
=========================================================
>-->From TheJokester:
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"888888PP"' `8""""""8 "888PP' `888P' `88P"88P"8m"
>Marketing Genius
Chevy Nova Award
* These are the nominees for the Chevy Nova Award. This is given
out in honor of the GM's fiasco in trying to market this car in
Central and South America. "No va" means, of course, in Spanish,
"it doesn't go".
* The Dairy Association's huge success with the campaign "Got Milk?"
prompted them to expand advertising to Mexico. It was soon brought
to their attention the Spanish translation read "Are you lactating?"
_.._..,_,_
( )
]~,"-.-~~[
.=])' (; ([
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~~----~~
Paul Martin Howard
* Coors put its slogan, "Turn It Loose," into Spanish, where it was
read as "Suffer From Diarrhea."
* Scandinavian vacuum manufacturer Electrolux used the following in
an American campaign: "Nothing sucks like an Electrolux."
* Clairol introduced the "Mist Stick," a curling iron, into Germany
only to find out that "mist" is slang for manure. Not too many
people had use for the "Manure Stick."
* When Gerber started selling baby food in Africa, they used the
same packaging as in the US, with the smiling baby on the label.
Later they learned that in Africa, companies routinely put pictures
on the labels of what's inside, since many people can't read.
* Colgate introduced a toothpaste in France called Cue, the name of
a notorious porno magazine.
* An American T-shirt maker in Miami printed shirts for the Spanish
market which promoted the Pope's visit. Instead of "I saw the Pope"
(el Papa), the shirts read "I Saw the Potato" la papa).
_......._
.:::::::::::.
/:::::::::::::\
;:::::::::===:::;
|_`'==='`_,,,_ `|
;;;-,,,-;;;;;;;-;
\;;;;;;;;;;;;;/
jgs ';;;;;;;;;;;'
`""""""'`
* Pepsi's "Come Alive With the Pepsi Generation" translated into
"Pepsi Brings Your Ancestors Back From the Grave" in Chinese.
* The Coca-Cola name in China was first read as "Kekoukela", meaning
"Bite the wax tadpole" or "female horse stuffed with wax", depending
on the dialect. Coke then researched 40,000 characters to find a
phonetic equivalent "kokou kole", translating into "happiness in the
mouth."
* Frank Perdue's chicken slogan, "It takes a strong man to make a
tender chicken" was translated into Spanish as "it takes an aroused
man to make a chicken affectionate."
* When Parker Pen marketed a ball-point pen in Mexico, its ads were
supposed to have read, "It won't leak in your pocket and embarrass
you." The company thought that the word "embarazar" (to impregnate)
meant to embarrass, so the ad read: "It won't leak in your pocket and
make you pregnant!"
* When American Airlines wanted to advertise its new leather first
class seats in the Mexican market, it translated its "Fly In Leather"
campaign literally, which meant "Fly Naked" (vuela en cuero) in
Spanish!
=========================================================
>-->FUN Places To Net Visit :)
Animal Friends 6
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/animalfriends6.html
Revenge Parking!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/revengeparking.html
Morons At Work 5!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/mwork5.html
Unique Homes!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/uniquehomes.html
Houses Of Power!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/housesofpower.html
IRONIC Isn't It 3?
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/irony3.html
Maria The Goose!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/goose.html
At The Car Wash!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/carwash.html
Amazing Benches!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bench.html
Crocodile Man!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/crocodileman.html
Polar Bear Twins!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/polartwins.html
Orangutan Mom And Son!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/orang3.html
Beautiful Monarch Butterflies!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/monarchbutterflies.html
Thoughts Into Action 9!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/action9.html
God's Sky Paintings!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/gsky.html
Normandy Then And Now!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/normandy2.html
Humor With The Troops 4!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/humor4.html
9/11 And Troops INDEX!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/911andtroopsindex.html
Spring Time Pages INDEX
https://tinyurl.com/y4xyz2w8
-<>-
Some of Shangrala's Best Pages
http://www.amazafamily.com/index.html
Click To Give - Scroll to bottom for all others
https://tinyurl.com/y2nvpmjn
The Same Game
This is a game where you'll have to remove all the bubbles
by clicking on groups with the same color. But beware,
it's not as easy as it sounds!
http://www.mah-jongg.ch/samegame/
Ripleys and Believe It or Not!
Looking for the oddities of life? Look no further.
http://www.ripleys.com/
13 of the world's most stupid criminals
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-35785834
The Dumbest Criminals of 2018
https://www.ranker.com/list/dumbest-criminals-2018/ranker-news
Wackiest Celebrity Baby Names
https://tinyurl.com/y23cyvr5
Funny Cats and Kittens Meowing Compilation
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DXUAyRRkI6k
Try Not To Aww Watching Super Cute Parrots And Birds 2018
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8_v-1VbdJw
Cute pandas playing on the slide
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGF6bOi1NfA
-<>-
>From Our Friend LouiseAu :)
A great animated short film with a happy ending :)
https://youtu.be/07d2dXHYb94
Paul Daniels is a brilliant magician with a unique comedy style.
https://youtu.be/UC5BwubD9gc
Magic illusionist Derren Brown amazes James Cordon and the Late Show
audience with a pair of dice, a series of numbers, and a bag of rice.
https://youtu.be/zAJHUv2JS7w
One of the most beautiful and impressive trapeze acts, performed by
'Duo Scarlette' for the French television show 'The World's Greatest
Cabaret.'
https://youtu.be/sjwtaVwWS70
---
...Wow! Thanks LouiseAu!
=======================================================
>-->Quotes & Thunkers:
"Nintendo is releasing a video game that lets you simulate
taking care of a baby. When they heard this, gamers said,
'Hey, call me when you have one that simulates MAKING one.'"
-Conan O'Brien
"Today was International Dog Biscuit Appreciation Day.
There's a party later tonight, but I heard it's going to
be a real snausage fest." -Seth Meyers
"A new study found that most people cant go 10 minutes
without lying. But since the study took 20 minutes nobody
knows what to believe." -Jimmy Fallon
"A college student in Pennsylvania is suing her school for
the C+ she got in a class. She said, 'I'm suing whoever's
responsible for this!' And her professor said, 'Don't you
mean WHOMEVER?'" -Jimmy Fallon
"A recent report shows that pot smokers get into fewer car
crashers than drunk people. Then again, it's easier to see
what is coming when you're driving at 11 miles-an-hour."
-Conan O'Brien
"A restaurant here in New York has started selling a so-
called 'New Yorker milkshake' which comes topped with
whipped cream and a slice of cheesecake. Which means the
next topping you'll get is a coffin lid." -Seth Meyers
"I read about a man in Virginia who paid the DMV his $3,000
fine in pennies. It took the workers 12 hours to count them
all. And that line still moved faster than the one you were
in waiting in at the DMV." -Jimmy Fallon
"Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus is officially
shutting down. Now, the circus won't officially close until
May, so if you don't get a chance to see it, you had 150
years. No one feels bad for you." -Stephen Colbert
"There's a new app out there that describes itself as Tinder
for adopting babies. So one day, siblings will be taunting
each other with, 'Ha ha, mom right-swiped you. You shouldn't
be here.'" -Conan O'Brien
"The thing I hate about an argument is that it always
interrupts a discussion."
- G. K. Chesterton
"The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a
cop in it."
- Dudley Moore
"The trouble with being poor is that it takes up all of
your time."
- Willem de Kooning
>Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html
FUN URLS
------------------------------------------------------------------------
-->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class
http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61
NEW LIFE IN CHRIST!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
-->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home
Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the
Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :)
Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes:
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html
Home Recipes
>Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE:
Share
A Recipe
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>TO SUBSCRIBE:Visit Here
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For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to
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